I’m not in the habit of adding music to my blog posts. So this is a special occasion — or just an opportunity for me to hunt down and try out a new plugin for my blog.

Yesterday I drove back to Loma Linda (from San Fernando) to get my H1N1 vaccine and to pick up some other things. This vaccine was the main reason. I received an email a couple weeks back saying that all students at Loma Linda University would be required to have the vaccination in order to register for Spring quarter. Last week (during exams), I received an email from one of my deans stating that I had not yet received mine and they wanted to know why and when I would get one. So, taking advantage of Christmas break (a time when the I’ve-got-to-study-every-minute-I-can feeling is slightly diminished), I decided to get my shot.

On the drive back I selected shuffle on my iPod and placed Apple in charge of my driving music. I frequently download music, add it to my library, and never listen to it. So there are plenty of songs that have a zero play count. But eventually I do get to hear some of the songs when my iPod shuffles to it.

Somewhere around Pasadena this song started playing (lyrics below). I think it was the first time I’d ever listened to it.

As the chorus played I thought about medicine — about the practice of it. I thought about the current healthcare reform debate. I thought about the seeming futility of trying to make a difference. I thought of all the practicing doctors who started out hoping to change the world but who have since become filled with cynicism. And I thought about Loma Linda University’s motto: “…to Make Man Whole.”

Can we make a difference on a grand scale? I don’t know. Through the optimistic lenses of my medical student glasses I’d like to hope that we can. I want to believe it’s possible.

But at the very least, we can start on the path towards changing the world by making a difference in the lives of one patient at a time.

Hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas.

If you’re a medical student, or any other student, I hope you get well-rested, refreshed, and ready to attack a new quarter come January.

If you’re out of school and working, I hope the office Christmas parties will have made you smile at least a little — even if it was to laugh at the foolishness around you.

And if you are a bum, I hope the chaos of the season will not be too overwhelming for you.

Change
Performed by Carrie Underwood
Album: Play On

What’cha gonna do with the 36 cents
Sticky with Coke on your floorboard
When a woman on the street is huddled in the cold
On a sidewalk vent trying to keep warm
Do you call her over hand her the change
Ask her a story ask her her name
Or do you tell yourself

You’re just a fool
Just a fool
You believe you can change the world
You’re just a fool
Just a fool
You believe you can change the world

What’cha gonna do when you’re watching t.v.
And an ad comes on
Yeah you know the kind
Flashin’ up pictures of a child in need
For a dime a day you can save a life
Do you call the number reach out a hand
Or do you change the channel call it a scam
Or do you tell yourself

You’re just a fool
Just a fool
You believe you can change the world
Don’t you listen to them when they say
You’re just a fool
Just a fool
You believe you can change the world
Oh the smallest thing can make all the difference
Love is alive
Don’t listen to them when they say
You’re just a fool
Just a fool
You believe you can change the world

The worlds so big it could break your heart
And you just wanna help
But not sure where to start
so you close your eyes
Send up a prayer into the dark

You’re just a fool
Just a fool
You believe you can change the world
Don’t listen to them when they say
Youre just a fool
Just a fool you believe
You can change the world
Oh the smallest thing can all the difference
Love is alive
Don’t listen to them when they say
You’re just a fool
Just a fool
You believe you can change the world

I was talking to someone who I would call my coach. She talked to me about now moving on to Peak Performance.

What is peak performance? She gave me a few things to consider.

I told her that my final exams for the fall quarter would begin on the week of December 14.

She told me that she wanted me to be prepared for exams by December 10 and that the days between the 10th and the 14th would serve as relaxed, light, review. Furthermore, she wanted me to attack my studies with 100% intensity. Two weeks before the exams I am to drop down to 80% and then the final week before the exams begin will be down to 60%

That sounds great. But how do I do that?

Well she told me it would be tiring. She told me that I would be tired now. But it would pay off during exams. It’d pay off when, on the night before my exam, I can go to bed early and wake up refreshed because I don’t have to cram.

My coach is a big fan of sports analogies. And I think the analogies are pretty spot on — at least most of the time.

How do peak performers, people who are at the top of their respective games, prepare for the big day/game?

Well this is what she taught me of what Peak Performers do:

• Get ready way ahead of time.
• Strategize from day 1 — and in my case this means forming a study strategy for every single subject.
• Practice daily as if I am performing on the final day — For me, she wants me studying now at 100% intensity because that is the intensity I will need come test day.
• Go for the win; no other option is on the radar
• Be solution-focused. If they don’t perform well, peak performers reflect, learn, and then grow. they don’t stew/gripe over a misstep.

It’s a tall order. I’m a bit intimidated by it. But I want to. I see her this coming week and she is expecting me to give a study plan for each subject. I am supposed to look ahead in the class schedule and start planning backwards.

This weekend I will create a daily schedule — hopefully I will be able to stick to it. No, I will stick to it.

It’s 5 weeks ’till game time. And the preparation begins now.

It’s the end of the second week of the sophomore year here at LLU. Some of you who have read my blog in the past might be wondering why I am writing about the beginning of sophomore year. Well because I am in the sophomore class — again. If you’re curious, check out my post titled “Back to Blogging” where I wrote about coming back to LLU after skipping exams and telling my dean I wanted his signature on my withdrawal slip.

It’s definitely strange. There is a sense of deja vu. Maybe it’s more than just a sense. I am hearing the same lectures for a second time. And I hope I can make the most of it.

But it is alienating to come into the lecture hall and see a totally different class. Unfamiliar voices and faces. And everyone there knows that you are a new face that was not part of the class 3 months ago — that you don’t belong.

I suck it up though. Because this is what I have to go through to get to where I want to be. And I’m not saying that my new classmates are unfriendly. They very well might be. And I have met a couple here and there that have been really nice. But I am definitely not the outgoing type. So that doesn’t help.

As I begin the second year for a second time I have to ask, what about me is different? Because if nothing has changed, then the outcome is likely to be the same frustration and anger that I felt before — which is definitely not a good thing. The last time it led to a failed attempt at withdrawing.

Well in short, a lot has changed. I am not the same student. Sure, I still want to goof off and procrastinate. But I have put myself on a schedule to keep myself on task. My break times, study times, meal times, and sleep times are planned out and printed out. I make a more concerted effort to focus and absorb/understand as much as possible from lectures. I cut down my internet/TV time. But the most significant change is probably attitude. I hate studying. I’ve said that before and I will probably be saying it many more times (or write it, for that matter).

But I have decided that I want to be a doctor. Yes, dear reader (intentionally left in the singular), I WANT TO BE A DOCTOR. And this process of spending hours with the books is NOT just a means to an end. Every opportunity to learn in medical school is a chance to shape the kind of doctor I will one day become. I don’t want to be some run-of-the-mill MD that just barely gets through, perfectly able to handle 90% of the problems 90% of the population see a doctor for.

The thing is, this will probably require me to throw my entire being at chasing a class ranking in the top 20% for this sophomore year (I’m not including the freshman year because mine sucked. I passed. But I’m definitely not proud of it.) Not for the sake of bragging rights, competitive residencies, or being “smart,” but because effectively soaking up everything I can in order to be the best doctor I can be will probably put me in that envied company as a serendipitous byproduct.

It’s a high challenge — especially for a life-long procrastinator and self-proclaimed loather-of-studying like me. Because it almost sounds like that percentile is my goal. And shockingly, that is the case. That’s what I am aiming for. In writing. On the Internet. For all (or one) to see.

In the end, should I fail to reach my goal, I hope that it is because I could not pull it off — not because I did not try hard enough or was not disciplined enough. Only time will tell, though.But the bar has been set high because one doesn’t achieve lofty goals without first being willing to set the goal behind daunting obstacles.

Wish me luck

She said there are positives and negatives to science and a job as a scientist. One big positive is the feeling one gets when making a big discovery. There is nothing like it. Unfortunately, those times are rare and one must cherish and hold on to those special moments.

Then she asked me how I deal with uncertainty because, in her mind, there is quite a bit of uncertainty when doing research.

I told her that I wasn’t quite sure. “I guess I’m uncertain about uncertainty,” I answered with a chuckle.

By the look on her face, I don’t think she was too amused…

*****

Dear Professor,

Medical school is filled with plenty of defining moments. During my first year, one of those moments was meeting you. I’m not quite sure what word I’d use to describe that time I first met you. Odd? Eerie? Creepy? Awesome? Inspiring? Solemn?

I remember looking at you, a little intimidated. You were the expert in what you were going to teach me. I was a little lost as to what I needed to do. I noticed your wrinkled skin. You could probably tell me a whole bunch of fascinating stories from your lifetime.

A classmate mumbled that you were old. But you looked calm and composed –- not at all like a rookie teacher. It was reassuring. I knew I’d learn a lot from you during the course of my first year.

I remember staring at the muscles of the neck in Anatomy lab. I was confused about which muscles were which. Was this the anterior scalene? Or was that the anterior scalene? If this one is the anterior, then that must be the middle. But wait, what the heck is this muscle here? Staring into a human neck for the first time can be disorienting. And it often only barely resembles the drawings in Netter’s Atlas. I lamented, but you offered no answer. Instead, you remained silent, forcing me to figure it out on my own. And when I finally figured it out, I thought I could make out the beginnings of a smile on your face.

Because I struggled, I remembered. And I did well on that first anatomy lab practical.

The rest of the year followed in similar fashion. I was stuck and confused. You stuck to your teaching method. At least you were consistent. Regardless, you stayed right beside me all along.

I came to accept your method of teaching and even found your silent presence calming — even if I often wished for you to just speak up and point out what I was looking for.

I just wanted to write this note to say thank you. I’m sorry you will never get to read this. At the memorial service we held for all those who had donated their bodies to our Anatomy program, I sat quietly and looked around. There were plenty of family members there to remember and celebrate their loved ones. I couldn’t help but wonder if your family was there.

Was it that old lady wiping away tears? Was it the young lady who sat proudly as her loved one was appreciated by so many students? I don’t know; I’ll never know.

I never knew your name. But I knew your face. I knew your arms, your hands, and your legs. I knew you inside and out. And I know that you have give 100% of yourself so that I could be a better doctor. Thank you, Professor.

I’ve been meaning to post this for a while now. Occasionally I get a question like this: I’m not Adventist, but I am a Christian. Should I apply to Loma Linda University?

In a previous post (What is Loma Linda University really like?) I wrote that I have not heard any complaints. Although I did write that I had never asked any of my classmates directly. Well last week I got the chance to ask two classmates who are not Seventh-Day Adventists how they felt about Loma Linda University. The gist of what they said is that while they might not believe everything Adventists believe, they are happy with their decision to attend a Christian medical school like Loma Linda.

I also found a blog entry by another classmate. He is Episcopalian and he writes about his thoughts on Loma Linda University at his blog Northwest Anglican. The post is titled Surviving Medical School with Faith Intact.

This article is from Spectrum Magazine and references the article above: Thoughts from an Episcopalian at Loma Linda University | Spectrum.

A quote from the post:

Another conversation I’ve had with some of my classmates is a “what if” conversation considering whether we would have gone to some of the more prestigious schools we applied to had we been accepted. And there was a time when I would have said, “yes,” that if I had gotten into Harvard or Mayo Clinic that I would have gone there. But looking back on this year and considering things with the eternal perspective of the importance of my soul, I would have to say, “no.” Think what you will about Seventh-day Adventist theology, but I have to say that they have founded and nourished an institution where a Christian can become a doctor and where they can be affirmed and encouraged in their faith in Jesus Christ. For this I am very thankful to my Adventist brothers and sisters.

Hopefully this will help those trying to decide which medical schools to apply to.

As I mentioned in another post, I often get asked what Loma Linda University is like. In a previous post (What is Loma Linda University really like?), I mentioned that service is really emphasized here.

The Class of 2010 put together a couple videos to show the types of things they did during their first summer. Below are the two videos telling the stories of these students and the patients they met.

Disclaimer: There are a couple graphic photographs (medically related). Be warned.

Part 1

Part 2

Click here to visit the project’s homepage. As of today, there is a video tour available (although it is a few months old since the building does not yet have walls in the video).

Below are artist renditions of the final project. At the very bottom is a picture I took today (on my phone) of the building — well at least part of it.

Front

Back

Centennial Complex (9/26/08)

Important Note: This post was written near the beginning of my second year.

In this day and age it’s really easy to become cynical about what is printed in brochures. We all know what it’s like to buy into some sort of hype and become disappointed with the end product. So we all learn that it’s best to do some research — that we shouldn’t believe everything the salesperson tells us.

Choosing a medical school can be tough. It’s like shopping for something very, very expensive. In a way, you’re shopping for four years of your life and an education that will hopefully launch a long career. And every once in a while I get questions about what Loma Linda is like.

Well that’s a fair question and I’ll try to give my perspective on the school in this post. I will say, however, I don’t have any strong negative opinions about the school. I do have some strong negative opinions about the summer heat, though.

With that said, here’s what I think about Loma Linda University School of Medicine:
*****
Location
Loma Linda University is located in the San Bernardino County, about an hour east of Los Angeles. We have mountains, desert, ocean, and a large metropolitan area nearby. It’s got something for everyone. The only complaint I have about this place is the summer weather. It can get uncomfortable hot in the summer. And that is really annoying when you have to walk around in a tie and white coat.

The area also has a pretty bad smog problem. Clear blue skies are not the norm. Don’t expect a San Diego blue in the sky.

Facilities
This is probably LLUs weakest area. While the Medical Center is state-of-the-art, the educational facilities are not. The school, founded in 1909, is old. And the building with the freshman amphitheater and anatomy lab feels just as old sometimes. It is better for the sophomore medical students who have classes in one of the newer buildings on campus, Alumni Hall. But as a Freshman, I really found it hard to enjoy sitting in lectures. However, it should be noted that the university is undergoing major construction work and soon the incoming students will have a brand new amphitheater and one of the largest anatomy labs in the country to use. The simulation center will also be moved to this brand new building. (See my post: Loma Linda University Centennial Complex.)

The main library could also use a new building. When exam week approaches, it can get hard to find a spot in the library. I would consider it small relative to other university libraries. Fortunately, medical students have access to other study areas on campus.

Faculty
It is not unusual for a professor to have prayer before beginning his or her lecture. As far as I remember, a faculty or staff member said a prayer before almost every exam. When a faculty or staff member didn’t, a student had volunteered.

They faculty here have been very friendly and inviting.

Anatomy can be a tough course. One thing I appreciated from our anatomy faculty was their willingness to come into the lab to conduct reviews for small groups. We would schedule a review with one of the professors and they would meet us in the Anatomy lab (sometimes as early as 7 AM or as late as 9 PM) to answer questions and point out important clinical structures that are difficult to explain in a lecture or during lab sessions when the labs are crowded. One PhD or MD, a cadaver, and about 8 students is a pretty good learning ratio.

One of our Biochemistry professors also has done reviews before each exam where he will take an hour to quickly go over the high points. It’s usually very high-yield.

One of our Pathology professors also records an audio review for each lecture (lectures are 50 minutes long) that can be downloaded by the students. These reviews are typically about ten to fifteen minutes long.

There are lecturers that I don’t particularly like for one reason or another. It might be the pace or their style of presentation. Sometimes I choose to skip those lecturers. Some of my classmates never go to lecture. Others have perfect attendance. So I guess this is a personal preference.

The school does not record the lectures but does provide a syllabus with notes. The notes are prepared by the lecturers. Some are very detailed that it feels like reading a text book. Some are abbreviated and presented in the form of an outline. And the worst ones (for me) are the handouts that only have the powerpoint slides printed out. I prefer highlighting written text than scribbling something next to pictures.

Pine Springs Ranch
Each year the School of Medicine plans a retreat to Pine Springs Ranch. It is held at the end of September and is a great time to get away from school. The two-night stay and meals at the camp cafeteria are all paid for by the school. The highlight of the weekend is the talent show on Saturday night that showcases the talents, or lack of talent, of students and faculty alike.

Students
The students, on the whole, are friendly. Admittedly, I’m not buddy-buddy with everyone in my class. But I also haven’t ever had a confrontation with anyone, verbal or physical.

I don’t feel like I am in a cut-throat environment. People freely help each other. This may be a result of the school’s grading policy (Pass/Fail). It might also have something to do with the fact that most students, if not all, are attending Loma Linda because they want to be in a Christian environment.

Curriculum
The School of Medicine is currently transitioning to a system-based approach. We still have individual classes like Pathology, Pathophysiology, etc., but when possible, they are coordinated so that they are discussing the same organ system at the same time. I like this approach. It feels like you’re attacking the same topic from different angles. It’s a good reinforcement.

Religious Affiliation
The school is run by the Seventh-day Adventist Church. I have no problem with that, although I am a Seventh-day Adventist. I have many other classmates who are not Seventh-day Adventists and I have not heard any complaints from them.

The school does require religion courses. But they don’t try to convert the students to Seventh-day Adventism. Religion classes include courses like “Medicine, Humanity, and God,” “Wholeness for Physicians,” “Medicine and Ethics,” and “Art of Integrative Care.”

First and second year students are also required to attend weekly chapel services every Wednesday. The hour-long chapel services is held at 11 and so Wednesdays usually have 3 lectures instead of 4.

As a Christian school, Loma Linda expects its students to live according to traditional Christian principles. For some that is a ridiculous expectation and they choose to apply elsewhere.

Service
Loma Linda University has a long history of being involved in the local community. The San Bernardino County has a shortage of healthcare. School drop-out rates are one of the worst in the state of California. There are a couple of programs that were started by medical students to help the children of the surrounding community. One program utilizes medical students as tutors for local schools who need help. Another program mentors pregnant teens. Another program is aimed towards mentoring young men in high school. There is another program called STATS which stands for Students Teaching AIDS To Students, which should be self-explanatory.

During the summer, the school usually organizes medical mission trips. These trips have participation from all the University schools including the schools of medicine, dentistry, and nursing. This past summer there were trips to both Africa and South America.

These summer mission trips draw interest from many students who are between their first and second years of medical school. The Class of 2010 created a video to share their experiences from their first summer. You can see the videos here.

If one is interested in service, there are plenty of opportunities for that.
*****

Hopefully this gives a little bit of a picture of what Loma Linda University is like. Choosing a medical school is a personal process. Loma Linda University is not for everyone, but I’m glad it was for me. If you have specific questions, feel free to leave a comment or email me.

I had my backpack on and walked slightly in front of both of my parents. It felt a bit awkward. I asked my mom when was the last time she went to school with me. “Kindergarten,” she replied.

The provided us a small breakfast. After breakfast they had 3 hours of lecture scheduled for us.

The first class began at 8:30 AM and was on micturition (urination).

Lecture two, at 9:30 AM, was an hour about eye exam. My dad actually fell asleep in this lecture. Me? I was doing my best to stay alert. After all, can’t be falling asleep during a lecture with mom nearby. Third lecture was an embryology lecture on the endocrine system.

After lectures we were scheduled to have lunch at 11:45. The large crowd headed towards the conference center below the School of Medicine administration offices. There they served some pretty good food. I don’t think any of the parents believed that the meal was any example of normal treatment for students.

That afternoon, we got a chance to show our parents/guests some of the labs. I took my parents to the Physical Diagnosis “lab.” They listened to heart sounds with a stethophone, palpated a simulated prostate, and checked out some ear models. We then went to the Simulation Center in the physiology building. That was pretty cool. They showed off all the high-tech dummies.

I thought the whole thing was fun. It was a good chance for the parents to come and see what everything was all about. The students got a chance to show off our campus and facilities.

When I started this post I thought I was going to come up with a pretty brilliant way to close the post.

Right now I’m kind of drawing a blank.

End of post.